Couples Counseling

When should we seek assistance?

Relationships are hard, even when you love each other. It can be all too easy to get stuck in a rut, repeating the same mistakes with each other over and over again but hoping for a different result.

Couples counseling can help!

You may think, “Things aren’t THAT bad,” or “Counseling is only for people about to divorce,” or “Why bother going, they’ll just say we need to split up.” But as you may have noticed, the expectations we have of our relationships have changed dramatically. The old models just don’t work anymore, including when it’s “necessary” to seek help.

If you feel uneasy about how things are going, why not give something different a chance?

“And if not now, when?”

— The Talmud

Direct, Realistic, and Compassionate

Anyone can learn how to be a better partner. As long as you’re willing to try, we can work together to identify the roots of the problems…which usually were established long before you ever met each other! You have the power to rise to the occasion and transform your relationship.

I work from a family systems perspective: individuals cannot be understood in isolation from one another, but rather as a part of their family (born and chosen), as the family is an emotional unit. Families are systems of interconnected and interdependent individuals, none of whom can be understood in isolation from the system. I also keep attachment in mind: Attachment theory is centered on the emotional bonds between people and suggests that our earliest attachments can leave a lasting mark on all kinds of relationships throughout our lifetime.

I employ approaches from Relational Life Therapy, established by Terry Real; as well as from Martha Kauppi of the Institute for Relational Intimacy; and Esther Perel.

Learn More

Video: On grandiosity and shame, an interview between Esther Perel and Terry Real